Consuelo’s husband Edgar was puzzling over an english language newspaper. I had the Classifieds.Wiping hands on aprons, both ladies came into the living room.“What?” Karen said.“It had better be good, Newbie,” said her Spanish American cohort.“Yeah,” Karen agreed.Newbie came from a discussion we had had concerning backs with water on them and “Boat People.”Consuelo could trace her heritage back to 1535 when her ancestor, Juan Rodríguez Cabrillo was issued or claimed a three million acre land-grant in and around San Diego. Records had been lost, recovered, lost again and disputed by Americanos. Facts are facts. My ancestors are Finnish and “Boat People.”Firmly put in my place I conceded the victory. I stopped worrying about Karen’s friends ... we were, after all, newcomers.“Remember that little town above Porcupine Falls?” I asked Karen.“Like I’d ever forget that ... you asshole.” Fire blossomed in her eye.“Steep wasn’t it,” I got a chuckle out of that.“What about it?”“That little. Since the worst thing the guys in thefrat could imagine was for a guy to be viewed as sissy, her plan was toturn the frat officers into the limp-wristed sissies they pictured Joeyas being."It would be the perfect punishment, if such a thing were possible," Iexplained. "But the stories of this being done during movies to getpeople to buy more popcorn were nothing but Urban Legends; you justcan't make a person do something against their will."Barb smiled and shook her head. "You're right; you can't make a persondo something against their will. You can however change their will,thereby making them want to do something they wouldn't otherwise dreamof doing!"Barb went on to tell me the story of her younger sister Amy who had oncebeen her completely out-of-control brother Drew. Drew had always been ahandful for Barb and her mom but after a head injury, he became so nastythat Barb and her mom used mind-altering tapes to make him want to be agirl.The tapes did their job; once her brother.
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